Did Reese Witherspoon Slut-Shame Me?
And, a story about a fair-weathered friend with life advice from Anne Lamott
Welcome to ADD Thursday. ADD really happens every day of the week, but today I’m going to tell you everything going through my head!
First, Jen is still sick. She was working on a post for today, but then last night she said she still wasn't feeling well, so I said, “Rest up, I got it.” So now I gotta get it. Except I woke up this morning with a stomach ache, which is where I’m going to start my list.
1 - I woke up with a stomach ache and almost called in sick to work. Then I opened my email and read the craziest thing: Did you know that August 24th is the most called-in-sick day of the year? How weird is that? Why is everyone sick on August 24th? In my case, I think it’s because I ate too many cotton candy grapes last night. WHY ARE THEY SO GOOD?
When I Googled why people call in sick on August 24th, the most common reason is stomach bugs! So now I’m left to wonder: IS EVERYONE EATING TOO MANY COTTON CANDY GRAPES ON AUGUST 23rd?
2 - After this, I read Kelly Oxford’s latest Substack post about her favorite Tom Cruise dating story and it got me thinking about my own favorite celebrity story. I have quite a few, but one of my favorites is the time Reese Witherspoon slut-shamed me.
Okay, Reese didn’t slut-shame me herself. But her bestie who was in charge of her production company did, so it was kind of like Reese slut-shaming by proxy. I was pitching 20 Times a Lady/What’s Your Number? for a movie (after I got the book deal but before I wrote the book — I don’t know why my agent sent me out then), and they were interested in it so I went to their offices for a meeting. When I told her bestie how the main character slept with 20 men, she goes, “Ewww, gross.” I said, “No, it’s actually really common to have that many sexual partners. People are settling down later in life, women can have unemotional sex….” And she goes, “I don’t know anyone who’s slept with that many men. It’s disgusting.” You know what’s disgusting? YOUR JUDGEMENT, LADY. I don’t remember her name, but she also seemed like the type of person to yell, “Do you know who I am?” during a drunken traffic stop.
Right after this I pitched it to Jennifer’s Aniston’s production company (which was also run by her bestie), and she…
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