Welcome to Our Substack!
A Substack, because our bodies weren't made for OnlyFans
Good morning! What a Sunday we had. While Hollywood was busy celebrating the year in movies, we launched our Substack and landed at #15 in the Humor category. Huge thanks to all of you!
» Make sure to check out Jen’s new post, The Pivot!
We have an exciting week ahead of us but don’t worry, we won’t blow up your inbox. We'll only send emails for the must-see posts, so make sure you browse our Substack for any gems you may have missed!
ICYMI, tune in to What We Bought This Week and check out The Penny Drop. And if you’re into old things, dive into the Vintage Posts from our old blogs. For our first weeks, we're offering more free content than usual, so enjoy.
What is this thing?
It’s Always Something is a humorous newsletter of essays, musings, rants and raves about the things that consume us. Currently for Jen it’s finding the kind of seven-step skincare regime that will erase decades of too much wine and not enough sunscreen. (She is, to this point, unsuccessful.) For Karyn, it’s holding a grudge for 15 years and counting against the cable repairman who commented on her lack of cord organization.
Who are we and why now?
Back in the early 2000s when the Internet was the Wild West, we started the websites ‘Save Karyn’ and ‘Jennsylvania’ – and they both went viral. This kickstarted our writing careers and completely changed the trajectory of our lives. 20 years later, our combined accomplishments include: 19 books published in over 10 languages worldwide, 13 New York Times bestsellers, one feature film (starring sexiest man alive Chris Evans), half a dozen ideas optioned for film & tv, four appearances on The Today Show and one on Oprah, and hundreds of stories about us in pubs like The NY Times, LA Times, People, Time, The Wall Street Journal and more.
Life is crazy and we’re proud of our success, but when we think back to when we started, it’s the community we created and the friends we made along the way that we cherish the most - which is why we’re starting this Substack. We miss it. We miss you.
What can you expect?
Our motto here is ‘No Rules, Just Writers’ – and that’s just what you’re going to get. We’ll be serving up a smorgasbord of essays, rants and raves about whatever we’re obsessed with at the moment. We’ll dish on pop culture happenings and the latest news stories, give hot takes on our favorite tv shows, chat with author friends and have guest contributors. There's much more to come and trust us – you won’t want to miss it!
Why subscribe?
In order to enjoy these goodies, you’ll need to subscribe. If you don’t want to pay, the free version will get you access to one post a week and every new edition will be delivered straight to your inbox so you'll never miss an update. But if you choose to become a paid subscriber for just $5 per month or $50 annually, you’ll get full access to all newsletters, the archive and more. Here's a breakdown:
At least 5 posts per week (we have a lot to say)
Audio readings of posts (for people too lazy to read)
Full access to the archive (perfect for scrolling in bed at night)
The ability to comment on articles (you can rant right along with us)
Exclusive video content (no nudies though, boooo)
Access to subscriber-only threads
Vintage posts from our long-archived blogs
So if you're looking for a break from the mundane and want to inject a little fun and humor into your inbox, join us! We hope to see you on the other side.
I'm a new subscriber, so forgive me if this is already answered somewhere I haven't looked. Are all posts available as audio (not lazy - long commute!) files or just occasionally? Thank you!